Mr. Dalley (my year 10 history teacher) would often tell us the story of an African tribal leader would walk around with a rock in his mouth.
When asked a question from one of his tribal members, he would stop and think and take the rock out of his mouth. By the time the rock was out, if what he had to say was still relevant, he would give his advice. If he didn't think that advise was of significant
value, he would simply put the rock back in his mouth and reconsider his answer.
How often have you said something when feeling angry, stressed or pressured that you later felt could have been pout a lot better had you have taken the time to think about it first?
Emotion moves faster than logic.
When you get upset, angry or stressed, the adrenaline released into your bloodstream impairs your logic and your ability to make good decisions. That's why when you are really upset or stressed, you end up saying hurtful things and making inefficient actions. Take control of your emotions by letting your logic catch up.
Some people (your clients, customers or even staff) will deliberately say things to provoke you - just to see how you will respond. In these situations, you need to keep a level and clear head.
In radio, the main stations have a 7 second delay between what is said and what is aired
to the public. Follow this example and allow time to elapse before you react - especially when you are tired and more emotionally vulnerable.
Always wait 4-5 seconds before replying to that question, email, or accusation that is increasing your emotional intensity. In professional speaking we sometimes pause after making an important statement to allow the audience to really let it sink in.
Allow a time buffer between feeling something and responding to it.
Before responding to any 'emotionally charged' meeting, accusation or email, take a few
seconds to remove an imaginary rock from your mouth and then decide if what you are feeling is really the best thing to say right now.
An impulsive reaction can cost you time, reputation, money and all the hard work you have put into building relationships.
(Thanks Mr. Dalley...I told you that I was paying attention in your class)
