When you run your business by yourself, or work in a high pressure role, it is easy to become side tracked, lose interest in a project, feel overwhelmed by the workload, or even give up altogether. At times, everything can feel ‘too hard’, and like ‘you’ll never get there’, or ‘there is just too much to do’.
In this frame of mind, your energy becomes quickly drained, your mind is easily distracted and you become less effective in driving your business.
In 1976, Psychologists Maier & Seligman conducted experiments, finding that when dogs felt that they were unable to escape from a pain, they gave up trying and just whimpered. This state is known as learnt helplessness. Although this experiment was very cruel, this state of 'learnt helplessness' has also been identified in people.
When a person believes that their efforts cannot change or influence their destiny they develop a sense of helplessness where they feel powerless to be able to change their destiny. Feeling helpless, overwhelmed or stressed reduces the amount of effort and perseverance you put into pursuing their goals and it also drains your motivation.
One key factor in overcoming helplessness or overwhelm is having a sense ‘support’ from other people in ‘micro-community’ where you are not alone.
A Mastermind group is a supportive group of like-minded people who collectively brainstorm ideas, strategies, techniques and concepts to help people move forward in their business/life and become ‘unstuck’.
A Mastermind group is not a social gathering of friends, neither is it a session to air your complaints about life and feel sorry for yourself. To make a Mastermind group work, it has to be made up of people who are positive, self motivated, proactive and have a desire to help others reach their goals.
The selection of the right people is critical to the success of your mastermind group. Here are some criteria to consider:
1. Select ‘Do-ers’, not Talkers
It is of little value to be in a group of people who talk about ‘what needs to be done’ or ‘things they could do’ and not to take action on them. This creates inertia. That is, it reinforces your feeling of stuckness because no change is being put into place.
Instead, ensure that people have a track record of results. Meaning, that they actually do what it is they say they will do – and not just talk it. If it is just the company that you enjoy, then get a dog.
2. Select Biters, not Leeches
In the insect world, a biter confronts and attacks by striking, whereas a leech sucks it dry.
In mastermind groups, it is better to have ‘biters’. These are people who offer honest, upfront and direct feedback on your work by giving you information and insight that is of value. Biters are good communicators and openly share their wisdom and time with others in the group.
Leeches are takers. They sit and suck in information and tips from others, offering very little value to the group. They are often insecure people who have a working attitude of taking instead of sharing and giving. Leeches are often over friendly until they get what they want and then drop you like a hot potato.
3. Select Drivers not Draggers
Drivers take initiative, they set goals, action plans, and inspire others to step up a level and become all they can be. They believe in themselves and push others to excel. They are forward focused and spend little, if any, time worrying about the past or wallowing about their mistakes
Draggers don’t lead, they follow the heard. They don’t express their opinion unless asked. They have to be encouraged to try new things and often resist change. They drag back the progress of the others in the group because are waiting for someone to give them the answer instead of being proactive in finding it themselves.
4. Select Soarers, not Floaters
Soarers are people who actually have achieved the results that you want. These people are at a higher level than you in some area of knowledge, skill, ability or accomplishment. You want to be around people who can drag you up to their level.
Floaters are those at a similar or lower level of knowledge, skill, ability or accomplishment than you. They offer little value to you except making you feel good that you are helping them. Although there is great merit and reward in helping Floaters move forward in their careers and business, they don't serve you to have them in your Mastermind group.
Choose to be in a group with people who can stretch you and teach you what you don't know.
